Train to Control Your Ego

 

Mawlana Shaykh Hisham Kabbani

www.NurMuhammad.com

We left last time that the eighth level is to run away, to where? To Allah, as Allah said, fa firru il-Allah, innee lakum min hu nadheerun mubeen. Running to Allah is very important and this will take you to the level of 'riyaada'. ·                    What is physical education (riyaada). ·                    What is physical education? ·                    Riyaada is sports in Arabic. ·                    Riyaada is anything that you keep doing in order to tamrind, ·                    to exercise and to make yourself adjusted to that kind of exercise, in order you get used to doing that. ·                    Some people lift weights, 10 or 15 or 20 or 30 lbs. ·                    That is tamrind, training. Like you do: you said you do tennis, table tennis, swimming, soccer, basketball, women riding [only one Shaykh ]. What do you do more? Sports training, training, training… so when you are training you are making your body more stronger and in this sense here where we are focusing, the mureed keeps training, when you say you are training a wild horse to become domesticated, you have to train to make your ego tamed. That is the ninth level, the full control now, as we described the ninth level, to have control of your ego and to ride your ego. ·                    When you ride your ego, that is before the highest level, where the awliyaullah are looking at you, and you can ride it and it no longer can ride you, you tamed your ego. ·                    Allah said, walladheena … those who dispense their charity with their hearts full of fear because they will return to their Lord. ·                    They are feeling fear of Allah (swt) and they are returning to him and they are taming their egos not to disobey their Lord, according to what Allah said, 51:50, and according to the verse ati` Allaha wa ati` ar-rasula… so when you attain to train the ego, to listen. ·                    Now your ego doesn’t listen. ·                    You might spend more time to make your ego happy than you are spending time to make Allah with you. ·                    The ego is happy with anything of dunya and is not happy with anything of akhira. ·                    That is why tricks of ego will trick you, the prophet said, allamoo awlaadakum as-sibaha wa rukub al-khayl. So we have permission to do that and that is part of sport so now we have permission to do cricket and ping pong table and domino table and basketball table and what other table. They might bring out table cloth also, anything table. So that is some kind of ego’s tricks that says no problem this is sports, you have to train yourself. But on the other hand it delays us, though there is no sin in it, to make your body strong and play sport, but it is taking your time from training your ego to pray more or do dhikrullah more or read Quran more ore read hadith more and it is giving permission to the ego to do what it likes under the title sports. That is one of the tricks that the ego will play with us. It doesn’t know Shaykh, it doesn’t know Alim, it doesn’t know anyone. So what we have to do? We have to fight it. How? By training to do anything that needs to be done. There is no sin in it but it delays in doing what you need to do. So we begin to train the ego and train it to accept to say the truth. Because what is most important. To say the truth. If you don’t say the truth then you are lost. Yahay bin Yahya, said to Imam Malik, give me advice. He said I advise you three advices if you do them you will be safe. 1. the whole knowledge that ulama inherited and wrote about and I as Imam Malik, had 600 teachers teaching me tasawwuf, and 300 teachers that taught me fiqh – a total of 900 teachers, all these ulama that have taught me, and all the `ulama I will put together and give it to you in one sentence. He said what is it. If you are asked about something and you don’t know, say I don’t know.” The truth. That is what we are discussing on the ninth level – to train the ego to say the truth. Now when you are an alim and between ulama everyone wants to show they know more. Once I was with Mawlana Shaykh Nazim with my uncle and he was considered a murja in `ilm teaching Maliki, Shafii, Hanafi fiqh. And we were sitting with `ulama. And I asked my uncle to let Shaykh Nazim to speak. And my uncle looked at Mawlana and Mawlana looked at my uncle and he did not speak. Mawlana did not speak. Later he said never throw diamonds between the feet of people it is meaningless because everyone wants to show his ego and his pride and no one will listen to what I have to say. It is not necessary to speak. He said I am giving you khulasat al-`ilm, when you are asked and you don’t know, say I don’t know. Bring yourself down. Train the ego it is very important to train the ego to say the truth. 2. I will put together what all the medicine of the physicians, the whole fruit of the knowledge of medicine I will give to you in one sentence. He said, pull out your hand from eating as long as you have desire to eat. An tarfa` yadak `ani’tam. It means don’t eat to your nose, very full. Though you have desire to eat it back up. That is the hadith of the Prophet: the stomach is the house of illness. And he said, we are a people that don’t eat until we get hungry and we don’t eat until we are full. I am giving you the fruit of all medicine and then you will never see sickness in your life. That is training the ego to listen and to accept to say the truth. 3.  tu’ajma`u laka hikmat al-hukama’. If they put all the wisdom of the wise together I will give it to you. If you are among a people keep most silent of them, so if they reach the point when they give a decision, it is as if it was your decision and as if you said what was necessary, if they make a mistake and you kept quiet, no one will blame you. Three wisdoms he gave him in 3 sentences: to say the truth, to say if don’t know if I don’t know. 2nd not to eat too much. 3rd to be silent, not to talk. This will make you train the ego, to ride the ego. Then when you ride the ego, then the ego cannot control you. When you say I am not eating, it will say sam`an wa ata`an. Then if you are not trained you will be overcome by your ego. That is why if I give you more soup, then it is going with the ego’s desires to not eat. In tariqat there is nothing with the ego’s desires. Even if the Shaykh says eat the whole pot then you eat the whole pot and.. How many times the Shaykh made us to eat and eat and eat  until you have to extend yourself to open space. Even in smallest you say enough and he is making it with du`a and salawat and you are showing your disobedience, struggling saying no, I cannot eat anymore, it is enough. That is for something that is not gong to kill you. What do you think if he orders you for a bigger order. If he says to eat, then eat, don’t say “no.” I never forgot this meat that Grandshaykh gave to me to eat, me and my brother. In old times there were no refrigerators they used to cut the meat and hang in the sun and hang in cabinets. When they want to eat they boil it. So one time we were there and he said, you don’t go until you eat. We used to come late and pray tahajjud and go back. He said eat and go. Then he told his wife, go and get that meat. Oh, that whole house and kitchen was smelling from that meat. You can raise your head? No. you can say something. Then they brought that pot in front of Grand Shaykh Abdullah al-Faiz ad-Daghestani. Then he took all this meat in big chunks and put in the bowl, smelly smelly smelly, who knows how many years it was sitting in the closet. Test. That was a test they are giving something to poison you. Then he said eat. We looked we cannot eat. Looking we see thousands of white worms coming from the meat and from the bones. Eat. And Mawlana shaykh looking and says eat. How can you eat. Bismillah ir rahman ir-raheem but almost vomiting , everything in front of you is going to come out. If you vomit you will be thrown out of the tariqat. And preparing the water on one side and trying. And Mawlana taking one big chunk in his mouth and gone., another chunk gone. So as soon as we put in our mouth the smell is gone, the worms are gone. They want to check you. They make the entire scene in front of your eyes. That is how they train you. Then they perfect you, then they give you what they want of your trust. So now we come to the last one. When your ego is trained to obey how do you obey? Thru listening. Al-istima`. Wa law `alimAllahu feehim khayran la-asma`ahum wa law asma`ahum… If Allah had found in them any good, He would have made them to listen if they had  listened they would have turned back and then decline. It means if the ego is good it would have listened. But Allah knows that the bad ego will never listen until you train it to control it. Always when the ego is riding you there is no way it will listen. You leave your husband you leave your children and only because you are listening to your ego. You don’t hear anyone else. That is why wa law` alim Allahu feehim khayran la-asma`ahum. Allah knows they are not going to listen, since the ego is riding on them. It means you are not going to listen, because you are under the control of the ego.